100 First Date Questions

Jump to a group

Use the groups as a playlist, not a script. Start light while you walk or wait for dessert. Save deeper questions for after you both have settled. The Utah list is for people who actually live here. The plan-first list is for nights that already have a time and a place — including a plan posted on Rove.

How to use this list without making it weird

Pick three questions before you go and keep the rest in your pocket. If you read from your phone at the table, it will feel like homework. If you remember one good question and follow the answer, you will sound like a person.

Match the question to the setting. A parkway walk can handle a longer answer. A Creamery line wants something short. A campus museum gives you exhibits to point at when a question lands flat.

Listen for the second sentence. “I am from Idaho” is a fact. “I am from Idaho, and I still miss having a backyard” is a door. Walk through the door instead of firing the next numbered question.

Skip anything that turns the night into a testimony meeting or a background check. Faith, family, and school can come up naturally here. Force-feeding them on minute twelve is how a good walk becomes a debate.

Light first date questions

These are low-stakes. They work in the first ten minutes, in a soda-shop line, or while you look for parking. Use them to find a shared tempo before you go deeper.

1. What has been the highlight of your week so far?
2. Are you more of a morning hike or a sunset walk?
3. What is the last thing that made you laugh out loud?
4. If you had a free Saturday with no homework, how would you spend it?
5. Sweet or salty — what do you order at the Creamery?
6. What class or project is taking most of your brain this month?
7. Do you like planning the night or showing up and seeing what happens?
8. What song have you had on repeat lately?
9. Indoor museum or outdoor trail for a first outing?
10. What is your go-to soda shop order?
11. Are you from Utah, or did you land here for school?
12. What is one small thing that always improves your day?
13. Board games, puzzles, or neither?
14. What time of day do you actually feel like yourself?
15. If we had thirty extra minutes after this, what would you want to add?
16. What is a comfort food you would drive across town for?
17. Do you keep a running list of places you want to try?
18. What is the last photo on your camera roll you are proud of?
19. Early dinner or a later dessert stop?
20. What does a perfect Sunday look like for you?

Fun first date questions

Use these when the night already has a little warmth. They should feel like a game, not a roast. If someone looks uncomfortable, drop back to light.

21. If you could teleport us to any Utah overlook right now, where would we go?
22. What is a talent you have that almost nobody knows about?
23. Would you rather get lost in a museum or on a canyon trail?
24. What movie do you pretend you have not seen twelve times?
25. If your friends described you in three words, what would they pick?
26. What is the silliest hill you will die on?
27. Are you an “arrive ten minutes early” person?
28. What is a skill you would learn if time were free?
29. Which Utah festival would you take a first-time visitor to?
30. If this date had a soundtrack, what song opens it?
31. What is a trend you will never participate in?
32. Would you rather picnic at Kiwanis or wander a farmers market?
33. What is your most used emoji, and are you willing to defend it?
34. If we had to pick a group date next, who are you bringing?
35. What is a childhood snack you still buy?
36. Are you Team sunrise Y hike or Team sunset parkway?
37. What would your friends roast you for tonight?
38. If you could guest-lecture one topic for twenty minutes, what is it?
39. What is a place in Utah Valley that looks better in person than in photos?
40. Would you rather win a board game or lose and still have a story?

Deeper first date questions

One or two of these is plenty. Ask them after you have shared a walk or a scoop, not as the opener. The goal is to learn how they treat people, not to collect a biography.

41. What is something you are quietly proud of this year?
42. How do you decide when someone is worth a second date?
43. What does a good friendship look like in your life right now?
44. When do you feel most at peace during a regular week?
45. What is a value you will not negotiate on?
46. How do you like to be checked on after a long day?
47. What is a lesson you learned the hard way?
48. Where do you hope to be living in five years — and is that flexible?
49. What does “showing up” mean to you in a relationship?
50. How do you recharge when you are socially tired?
51. What is a compliment that actually lands for you?
52. Who has shaped the way you date, for better or worse?
53. What is something you want people to understand about you sooner?
54. How do you handle plans changing at the last minute?
55. What does a healthy pace look like for you after a first date?
56. When you imagine a good partnership, what is ordinary about it?
57. What is a boundary you wish more people stated out loud?
58. How do faith, family, or school shape your week — if they do?
59. What is a risk you took that was worth it?
60. How do you know you are becoming a better version of yourself?

Utah-specific first date questions

These only work if you both have a map of this valley in your head. They are useful in Provo, Orem, Lehi, and on the drive between BYU and UVU. If one of you is new, treat the answers as a tour, not a quiz.

61. Creamery on Ninth or a soda shop first — where do you take visitors?
62. Have you hiked the Y, and would you do it again at a sane hour?
63. What is your honest take on Thanksgiving Point on a Saturday?
64. Provo, Orem, or Lehi — where do you actually like to spend a weeknight?
65. Best overlook you have found in Utah County that is not packed?
66. Are you a Temple Square lights person in December?
67. What is the most underrated museum on campus?
68. Utah Lake sunset or a canyon mouth walk?
69. Have you done Roots of Knowledge at UVU, and was it worth the detour?
70. Where do you stand on dirty soda as a personality trait?
71. What is your favorite stretch of the Provo River Parkway?
72. If we drove north, is it Ensign Peak or Red Butte Garden?
73. Have you had Aggie Ice Cream in Logan, or is that still a trip to plan?
74. What local event is actually fun and not just crowded?
75. Best picnic lawn you know that is still public and easy to park near?
76. Sundance in town or a quiet weekday at the same venues?
77. What Utah season do you think is secretly the best for a first date?
78. If we had one tank of gas, which canyon are we taking?
79. What is a Provo or Orem spot tourists miss?
80. Would you rather do a Saturday farmers market or a weeknight campus recital?

Questions for a plan-first date

These belong on a night that already has a shape — a posted plan on Rove, or an ask that named a time and a place. They help you decide whether to post a second night, not whether the first one “went well” in the abstract. For how to build that night, read how to plan a first date.

81. What about this plan made you say yes?
82. Was the time I picked actually convenient, or were you being kind?
83. If we do this again, would you keep the same length or go longer?
84. What is a public place you would feel comfortable meeting next?
85. Do you like knowing the whole plan, or just the first stop?
86. How much notice do you want before a weeknight date?
87. What is an easy no for you — late nights, long drives, surprise guests?
88. If this night had a second chapter, what would you add?
89. Are you more likely to say yes to a hike, a museum, or dessert?
90. How do you like to split the cost without making it weird?
91. Would you rather I post a new plan on Rove, or just text a time?
92. What made a past date feel easy to leave on time — in a good way?
93. Is there a friend you usually tell before you go out?
94. What is the kindest way to say a plan is not your thing?
95. Do you want a defined end time, or a natural wrap?
96. How do you feel about sharing the plan with friends before you go?
97. What would make a second plan feel like a step forward, not a copy?
98. If I posted this same night next week, would you still be interested?
99. What is one detail you wish more people put in a date invite?
100. After tonight, do you want a short recap text or a new plan first?

Turn the conversation into a second plan

If the answers are easy and the time went quickly, do not end with “we should do this again sometime.” Name the next night the same way you named this one. “Thursday, museum then dessert, 6:30?” is a plan. “I’ll text you” is a stall.

If you met on Rove, post the next plan or mark Interested in one he already posted. If you met another way, you can still put the second night on Rove so the time, place, and photo stay in one place. For the ask itself, use how to ask someone on a date. For the follow-up text, use what to text after a first date.

Ask these on a night that already exists

Questions land better when the date already has a time and a place. These are example plans a man could post on Rove. A woman would see the photo first, then mark Interested in that plan.

Ethan, 24

Parkway walk, then the Creamery

Provo · Wednesday 6:30 PM

Tyler, 26

Thanksgiving Point gardens

Lehi · Saturday 11:00 AM

Sam, 23

Swig, then Kiwanis Park

Orem · Tuesday 7:00 PM

See all dating guides →

Frequently asked questions

Use the questions on a real plan